GETTING THEM 31

 GETTING THEM 31

As I settled on the bus I could smell myself and I could imagine just how bad it was for the people around me. I had no sanitary pads to use which were relevant after an abortion so I opted to wear a cloth instead, I had packed it in my bag earlier as I headed to the clinic knowing I would need it. I paid the K5 fee and indicated where I would be dropping off. It wasn’t anywhere near home, as a matter of fact it was far from home but I could not afford a taxi.  I had tried to look for odd jobs to try and make ends meet but not many people were hiring, I had gone through a couple of houses in marshlands area asking if they needed a maid or anything in that regard but no one wanted to hire me. At this point I had come to terms with the possibility of just being a maid to make ends meet but that too was not going to help. My school was slowly getting affected, despite having been a good student, my concentration levels had gone down and being in class was even harder because I was often too tired and hungry to concentrate.  

The bus pulled over and I could hear whispers and sighs as I walked from the back to the front. I probably smelt terrible. The walk to my home was slow and tiring, I could hardly push myself, I was hungry and angry. I had become bitter with life but with no one to release my anger on. The unforgiving scotching sun made me take a moment to sit under the shed of an ornamental Figtree along the Kamloops road. I was exhausted and calling Austin would not change a thing. I do not know how I found myself in deep sleep until a lady called out to me. 

“Are you okay?”  

I opened my eyes and afforded a smile but was still not ready to admit I had a problem. Well at least not to her.  

“I am okay, I just got so tired and decided to rest, did not realise that I slept” 

I saw it was slowly turning into evening. I had to get home. I still did not have much strength, I had lost a lot of blood which was normal but I needed energy to regain back my strength.  

“I drove past and saw you sleeping, when I returned you were still here sleeping” she said. 

The lady looked about my age or slightly older but I could tell she was not more than 27 years old. 

“Thank you for your concern” I said as I attempted to get up but staggered back to the same position. 

“Are you fine?” she asked again 

I knew why this abortion had treated me so badly, I had kept the pregnancy for long enough to try and convince Austin but I was going to be stupid to allow that happen. I was already five months gone when I made the painful decision of once again terminating.  

“I had malaria and I am just coming back from a review… I am a student at unza renting in kalingalinga” 

The lady upon hearing the first sentence got comfortable enough to get closer to me. I presume she initially thought I was insane.