TOO FAR TO REACH 38

 

TOO FAR TO REACH 38

I sat on my bathroom floor completely regretting what had happened, I lost my temper and slapped Jacinta. Everything could have been avoided but my temper got the best of me, she was really trying me. Jacinta only left after throwing a serious tantrum, I was not sorry that she saw the worst of me but I was really just sorry that now was not the time. My husband was in hospital, he needed me. Luckily, only aunty knew what happened, Nancy was in her room and preparing for us to leave for the hospital. As I wallowed in self-pity, aunty knocked in my door.

“It’s open” I hesitantly replied.

I did not want to discuss what just happened but aunty was not letting go like that… we needed to talk about it.

“You did what any woman could do in your position, stop worrying now… prepare for the hospital visit”

My head was still buried in my hands as my legs curved in.

“You’ve been through too much lately, you need to prioritize your health… that means taking away any negative thought from your mind.. I support you… through everything”

Aunty and I packed what we could because we would  at the hospital for the rest of day. It was chilly that day but I was prepared to wear a blanket if I had to. Upon communicating that we were ready, uncle picked the keys and offered to drive us there. He still needed some rest so he was returning to the house. I still had another maid at home on stand by.

The ride to the clinic was dreadful, recounting how we got here simply made my blood boil. I was just getting happy but it was taken away so cruelly. I still had hope for better but it was hard to focus on that when my husband was confused to a bed and strapped in thousand tubes. I needed the strength to carry through but at this point only Jeff could have helped. Jeff had become a huge part of my life that his presence took away my worries, it was hard that when I needed him to make me strong… well .. he was in deep sleep.

“Jeff is so strong” Nancy said randomly

There was a steady silence in the car until uncle responded in agreement.

“Yes, that’s why I strongly believe he will pull through”

I sat quietly looking through my window as we escaped cape town traffic, the world was busy moving forward while our lives seemed to pose. If only this could be a long nightmare. I thought of Jacinta and instead of being remorseful I replayed the whole scenario in my head and was proud of myself. The memory of Jacinta outraged and emotionally pouring out empty threats made me smile.

“Where are you Pumulo?” Aunty asked as she shook me

“Somewhere in deep thought” I giggled.

“We are here”

“Oh.. yeah..” I replied as I prepared to disembark.

“Lets be very positive for Jeff’s sake” aunty added

The hospital was quiet, of was generally a quiet hospital with many members of staff who were quite professional. It was very common for a coupe of nurses and other medical staff to greet you as you walked along. This particular day, not many were in sight.

I thought “there must have been an emergency”

Mr Cloud was seated in the waiting lobby when we arrived, I had never seen him that calm. He was usually joking around and troubling me at all times. His face spelt out worry and confusion, I begun to panic inside but I stayed calm nonetheless.

“is everything okay?” Nancy asked worriedly.

“He coughed..”

That was all Mr. cloud said. We rushed to see what was happening after i dumped everything I had in my hands and ran with all my might to the intensive care ward. I heard Nancy and aunty asking me to be calm. The ward was packed with too many doctors trying to keep Jeff calm, he was breathing heavily with his eyes wide open. It was difficult to tell if he could see me as his eyes fixated in in my direction while he breathed deeply and groaningly, I kept my faith and said a short prayer.

“All my life I have had none to keep, Lord keep my soulmate alive for me. There’s nothing I bring to offer to you, but my broken soul I present to you, a humble heart pleads before you my God. Please be not far from me”